Sunday, January 27, 2013

Business time

Do real-life women actually lounge around in men's dress shirts? And if so, is it actually sexy? I have to admit I've never tried it, but I do own a couple sets of flannel button-down pajamas, and my husband is not so much a fan of those.

On TV women are always sashaying out of the bedroom with smug looks on their faces, like they just KNOW how adorably sexy they look. This is the first red flag for me. It's been my personal experience that whenever I think I look adorably sexy, I actually look atrocious. This is why I now avoid bar bathroom mirrors at all costs.

My second issue is that business casual garb does not put me in a sexy mood. Quite the opposite, it puts me in a depressive mood, as it conjures up visions of TPS reports and lines of drones waiting to heat up smelly Lean Cuisines in the communal microwave. If pocket protectors and security badges aren't considered sexy, I don't understand why the shirts that hold them are.

Perhaps before this look became a cliche, it was sexy because it wasn't sexy. But at this point it somehow comes across as both lazy and trying too hard... If you're looking to switch it up, I suggest a birthday suit and business socks.

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Gone with the wind and fabulously insane

The Real Housewives are at it again: Another talk-singing catastrophe was introduced on Watch What Happens Live last Sunday:



A small, tiny part of me kinda, sorta respects Kenya for trying to "own" this humiliating moment from a particularly painful episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta:



But when you fall on your face in the middle of a busy street, don't you "own" it by popping up and laughing it off? You don't keep tripping over yourself and pretending you're having an awesome time... and you don't make up a song about it, especially if you can't sing... right??

Either way, I'm horrified, yet entertained by Kenya's "Gone with the wind fabulous" single, which probably means she's a housewife that's here to stay.

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